Pregnant quesadillas and my kind of ice cream

Tomorrow I will post a baby bump picture. I took a belly baring one the other day, I just have to get up the courage to tack it up here. I am 35 weeks pregnant today. I have a Dr's apt at 1pm to do my sugar test, but I have been having some pretty bad braxton hicks contractions so I am hoping the Dr will poke around and tell me I am going into labor in 2 weeks. (Oh to dream...) By then I will have had at least one of my baby showers (yes, people planned my baby showers 3 and 2 weeks prior to my due date, and no, I don't want to talk about how much that stresses me out on top of all the other pregnant stresses) and the baby will be 37 weeks, so fully incubated.

Weight tracker for today is (I know everyone loves to know how much a pregnant lady has gained!) 

Drum roll please.....

149.6

This puts me at about 24-25 lbs total. This was in fact my goal... but I still have 5 weeks to go, so we will see what happens!

My Corbin was 2 weeks early, and 9lbs 5oz at that time, so I am really hoping this one will follow suit. 

More about that later, lets talk about quesadillas (which apparently isn't in my computers dictionary since the word always pops up red??)

My husbands family is all about tortillas. They have Mexican heritage, and apparently have been chowing down on tortillas since his mammas mammas mamma. Its like white people and white bread :) Or something like that. So at my bridal shower I received a tortilla warmer, a rolling pin and a recipe for tortillas. I'm not going to lie. I love tortillas, everything about mexican food, and this little guy. 

It's so cute! I use it often. And sometimes when there are not tortillas in it, there are cookies in it. 

Shhh...

But I cannot, for the life of me, make em round. I took this picture of one, but this was one of the best ones, after this they just got weirder and weirder looking. I asked for advice and everyone just says practice. At least I get to eat what I practice.

Good thing burritos are rolled..

So I gave my constantly starving 6 year old some dinner right after making these and he polished off 3 with turkey and cheese with a side of broccoli. Man that kid can eat sometimes.Then when I put him to bed I made dinner for me and my husband. He was tattooing at dinner time, so we ate late.  

The problem with being almost 9 months pregnant is this is what I cooked up for 2 people... Yes, 2. About a lb of chicken, beans, corn, spinach, mushrooms, broccoli, a MOUND of cheese and a whole pot of tortillas.  And yes, this is what I felt like eating. 

Unfortunately, the problem with being 9 months pregnant is that it is like having a lap band. I can only eat small meals often. I read articles about ladies being able to polish off an entire pizza or gallon of ice cream. I have yet to do this although again, I have had the desire. I credit my eating abilities to never being much of a eat till I'm stuffed kind of girl prior to this pregnancy and I know that I will be thankful for that when the baby comes out and all the extra weight stays in. 

So this is what I actually ate. 2 tortillas filled with chicken, cheese and tons of veggies. Yummm......... It was delicious, but I could barely finish these two.

This is a picture that I poked around at before cooking the tortillas. I make some slammin mexican food, but it sure looks weird. 

Why cant my food look like her food!!

Whaaa!

One thing I have not really wanted this pregnancy is ice cream. I have severely craved protein and fruit. 

Good baby.

I will be on a quest in a few short weeks (or very looooooong weeks) to be eating healthier and getting back into fighting shape, but I am trying to not to splurge till I pop then go cold turkey. The crappier I eat now, the harder it will be and the longer it will take later. I keep a ton of fruit and no snacks in my house. Sometimes its annoying, as I am sure it is for my boys, but they never complain. But it does make me make smarter choices when I get hungry. 

After my dinner all I kept thinking about was this giant bag of frozen blueberries that I bought yesterday. I was DREAMING about them... So I threw 2 cups of frozen blueberries, and 1 banana in a blender with a splash of milk for mixing purposes (this makes 2 servings) and slammed my treat. 

I dont know why someone would ever choose ice cream over this frozen creamy cup of deliciousness. 

And the best part is no weight gain, no processed sugar, and no ice cream belly afterwards.

Ill take a picture when I make another one tonight, as I am sure I will. 

15 weeks pregnant - update!

It's an apple! I will update this blog later today with a pic of my baby bump, after I shower :) I haven't taken one yet (a pic... or a shower) so I figured it was time that I did.

Weight gain update:
I am not sure what is up with my weight. I have been a steady 121-123 lbs for the past year or so, but around the beginning of the year I magically gained a few pounds for no reason, and held at 125.5 for months, so that is what I say my starting weight is at. At 8 1/2 weeks I gained my FIRST LB! <- you can read all about it here :). I weigh myself every morning, like I always do, and this morning I checked in at 128.2. I don't know if that can be accurate because the past few days it said 129.2, but I went for a run last night for the first time in a few days, and I think maybe that leveled me out. So at 15 weeks, I have gained 3lbs. My belly has grown quite a bit though, and none of my old clothes fit me anymore. If I do wear one of the two pants that still fit I have to unbutton them when I sit, and I have forgotten to button them back up a few times! Whoops.

I (still!) work out:
I worked for the first month and a half or so of the pregnancy, teaching yoga, strength, and cycling but shortly became so tired that I stopped working, and therefore stopped working out at all. We were at temps of 95-105 for the better part of the summer and between that and my utter exhaustion, I took some time off. Once I hit about 12 weeks I started feeling much better, the temps have dropped for the most part (its going to be randomly 95 today, but low to mid 80's the rest of the week). I started picking some yoga back up, I stick to a slow vinyasa that targets my legs, hips and arms, and a lot of stretching  but I keep things chill because I have noticed my balance has shifted and sometimes shifts again when I move! But my sciatica has been acting up a lot, so I have to do yoga or I'm in a lot of pain! I have started incorporating some mild strength training, pushups, squats, deadlifts and bicep curls mostly, and I do 10-15 minute supersets a few times a week. I usually do them at night if I am feeling anxious, and it helps get some anxiety out.

And of course I am still running. It's hard between the heat, Corbin, and Abe's crazy schedule. But I am trying to keep it up as much as possible. I ran 5 last night and I hope to run 5 today, but it will have to be tonight if I do, because of the heat expected for today. I don't run in the heat since becoming pregnant. My pace has slowed waaay down. I held a 9 minute mile for the most part before pregnancy. Im lucky if I can get a 10:30 out of myself. If I run on the bike path I can usually achieve that fine, but if I run in my neighborhood, the hills slow me down, I guess.

Running makes life better. Every time I run I just feel so much better throughout the rest of the day, it keeps my weight in check, and my anxiety low. Pregnancy has given me a lot of extra energy (when I am not exhausted) and I feel that it helps level me out. And I just love it, so as long as I am feeling ok then I will continue to run as often as I can.

Other then that things are normal. My belly is growing and i now have a prominent bump that, as long as I dress right, looks like a bump and not chub, which makes me happy. We went to the thrift store the other day and I bought some maternity clothes. The pants are kind of big still, but I bought quite a few elastic skirts and live in those most of the time.

I still haven't felt the baby move :( but I know I am still early and may not for a few more weeks. I am pretty excited for that. Abe and Corbin are really excited for that too. I shared a story with Corbin about how he ALWAYS had the hiccups when he was in my belly, so Corbin wants to nickname the baby hiccup at the first sign of them. Abe set up the crib yesterday, despite the fact that we have 5 more months, but I think he was just really excited to do it. So we now have a large crib in the house. Oh well. We also bought paint yesterday and I am going to paint the baby's wall today.

Oh, and I'm hot. All the time. So hot... all I want to do is eat ice chips and sit on top of an air conditioner vent. It makes being outside anytime it is hotter then 85 very uncomfortable, which means I haven't spent as much time outside as I normally do this summer. I plan on spending a lot of time outside this fall and winter though. Im dreaming of snow, which is a first for me ever. Abe always asks why I am so hot, and I say that I'm incubating. :)

So excited!!! I want the baby here now!

The first lb of pregnancy weight gain

8 1/2 weeks pregnant

So, I have gained a lb. One big fat pound into my journey of many more pounds to be gained. Have you ever played hearts on your computer and you can't play the hearts until they have been broken, and once they do break there is this noise of glass shattering? That is how I felt this morning when I stepped on the scale. I weigh myself once per day, at the same time everyday. You can read about why I weigh every day in my post HERE! My weight fluctuates, a pound up, a pound down, always returning back to normal in a day or two. But today was the third day of normal eating, and the scale stayed up. As the numbers flashed 126.6 in front of eyes I stepped off and had to take some time to evaluate how I felt about it.

Gaining weight is inevitable during pregnancy. It can also be a tricky game of whats too much and what is enough. For a normal weight woman, which is the category I fall into, you should gain between 25-35 lbs. For an underweight woman, more, and an overweight woman, less. Most women gain way too much weight when they are pregnant. With my son, who is 5 1/2 now, I believe I gained about 50 lbs. Gaining weight doesn't ever seem to be a big deal when you are pregnant, but it sure does hit you hard after the baby comes out and for some reason your still holding onto 40 extra pounds! Wait? I thought that was BABY weight!! No my friend, that was ice cream weight, and that kind of weight doesn't leave when the baby does.

Determined to be as healthy as possible during this pregnancy, as well as a much larger fear of weight gain then I ever remember having with my son, I am watching my weight gain this time around. This desire, accompanied with a lot of time on my hands has aloud me to do a lot of reading about weight gain and pregnancy. I have found articles from woman who recommend a large amount of weight gain to women who run marathons and train for figure competitions while pregnant. I think this all aids in my anxiety even more (as most medical research done on the internet does.) So who is right? Should I not worry about it and just eat whatever I want, should I go hard core and train for that half marathon I've been longing to train for? What do I do? Who do I listen to!!!

As a woman who has grown very found of working out hard, pushing myself to the limits, eating light and healthy and making darn sure my weight doesn't inch up the scale it has been very hard to let the walls down. Normally I wouldn't eat late, even if I was starving. Normally I would never go back for seconds. Normally I would limit my carbs and never add cheese. Normally I would make sure I got in at least 2 hours of working out every day. But normal is normal anymore, and every time I indulge into a little extra food if I feel I need it, or out of a workout because, frankly, I'm exhausted. It hurts. I know it shouldn't hurt, and I know I am making all the right decisions, but it doesn't mean the feelings are not there.  As someone recovered from a serious eating disorder, you find out it doesn't matter how recovered you are, your still just that little addict girl when it comes down to it. So, what do I do?

Well, I haven't figured that out yet, and I think that is the most important lesson that I have learned in dealing with addiction, anxiety, and fear of the unknown. There are no set answers and there are no proper ways to do things. I don't know how much I am going to gain or how my body is going to look afterwards. I don't know how I'm going to feel with each tick tock of the scale, much less how my body feels as I wake up day in and day out. I may get my energy back tomorrow and start running every day again, or something may happen to me in a month and I could be bed ridden for the rest of my pregnancy. (uuuuugggghhhh!) But no matter what it is, it is out of my control.

This is the moment in our decision making ways where it's most important to learn to give it all to God. The more I want to tighten the reigns, the more I know I should pass them along. Because life happens no matter what, and we get REALLY stressed out with or without God by our sides. But without Him, who knows what stupid decisions I would make, because that's what man kind does. But with Him, everything becomes a little less of a big deal, and a little easier to handle.